Category Archives: Your Mind

The Make It Happen Method for When Your Brain Betrays You

Make it

Do you ever feel like there’s nothing going on in your head?

You just sit there staring blankly. You know you need to be doing homework or coming up with that amazing idea, but you have absolutely nothing. Have you ever just sat around on a Saturday simply because you can’t figure out what to do.

It’s like your brain betrays you.

I have had those moments a lot this week. My brain refuses to work. It refuses to cooperate with me.

In these moments we have a tendency to do the 1,2,3’s.

1- Become frustrated
2- Get irritated
3- Give up

123

Usually by the time I get to number 3, I am ready for a nap. I start to feel groggy and grumpy, and no closer to finishing my project or having any fun.

But this week, just as I was starting to get frustrated, I tried something different.

 I tried the “make it happen” method.

It’s just as it sounds, you make it happen. I sat down at the computer and started typing. At first, I was literally typing: “I have nothing to type and this is ridiculous,” but then my brain caught on. Ideas were popping into my head and soon I was typing away and getting my stuff done. I made it happen.

Another time this week, we were trying to figure out what to do. Normally we go back and forth in an endless cycle of “what do you want to do’s”.

Make It Happen

Again, I decided to use the “make it happen” method. I just stood up and said let’s get in the car and go! Every one gave me the “ok weirdo” face, but off we went. It forced us to come up with an idea. We went to the movies and then got ice cream. We ended up laughing a lot and having a great time. A better time than sitting around wondering what to do and going through the 1,2,3’s.

The moral of this story:

When you have no ideas and you are descending into the 1,2,3’s, get up and make it happen!

Have you ever experienced not knowing what to do or where to start?
How did you handle it?
Have you ever experienced the 1,2,3’s?

See that box down there that says leave a comment? Yes, I know you see it, well go ahead type something. Tell us your experiences on this topic.

– NBL V –

Are You a Scaredy Cat?

fear glasses

The Yellow – Scaredy Cat Glasses

Do you wear scaredy cat glasses?

When you wear scaredy cat glasses, you see the world through your fear. You are afraid to take chances because it seems way too risky. You would rather play it safe than take a chance that potentially won’t work out.

Here are a few ways to tell if you wear scaredy cat glasses:
• You worry about the “what ifs”? What if it doesn’t work out? What if I look stupid? What if I suck? What if I fail? What if I get hurt? The list goes on and on.
• You focus more on your fear than on the potential reward of stepping out of your comfort zone.
• You would rather not try at all than risk it. Better safe than sorry.
• You don’t like to try new things.
• You feel like fear is holding you back from great experiences.

Does any of this sound like you? If it does, take OFF the scaredy cat glasses.

Seeing the world through fear means, you are not seeing things clearly!

Most of the time, amazing things are just beyond your comfort zone.

Here’s the catch: you will never know if you don’t take a chance!

YES, risks can be scary. But they are worth it!

What if the thing you are most afraid of ends up being the thing you are great at.
Your biggest fear could be your passion, your success, your joy!

Whether it works out or not, you will be proud of yourself for stretching your limits and trying.

I am so guilty of wearing these glasses. In reality, I let the glasses wear me. Seeing the world through fear has stopped me from so much. Instead of being bold, I have sat on the sidelines too many times wishing I took the fear glasses off. I don’t want to miss out because of fear.

Everyone has fear. It happens. It doesn’t mean you are weak or not capable of great things. It means you have an opportunity to be bold.

Choose to take chances despite your fears!

Don’t wear those glasses. Don’t let your fear guide you and your choices.
Choose to look at things through a different perspective.

– ttfn G –

Losing a Friend to Suicide

suicide prevention

These are the heartfelt and honest words of Joey Valdez.

Joey is an old friend, musician, recent high school graduate, and someone who just lost a friend to suicide. This is a difficult topic, but one that needs to be brought to light.

Here is what he shared:

Life is a beautiful, fragile thing, and I want to write about why you shouldn’t ever waste it.
I’m up at one in the morning making a Facebook post (something I don’t do often) because I’ve been thinking about my friend all day. Going to the burial today was a sense of catharsis as a mourner; being able to shovel the dirt that now covers his resting body helps me feel like I’ve done something for him, something that I’ve felt like I’ve needed to do ever since I found out about his passing. It’d been a while since I had seen some of you who came to the funeral. Sharing today with you was very special, and it’s something I’m sure I will always remember.
But this is about something different:
Suicide and depression is something that isn’t talked about enough in this culture. So many people have gone through it or are currently going through it, but even more people don’t understand that fact. When you’re depressed, you feel like you’re insane, like something must be wrong with you because you feel like you do, like you’re different than everyone else in this psychotic way. But that’s not true at all. I’ve been in that place years ago, and I’ve felt alone, like there were no friends to turn to, like I must be defective for feeling depressed. And I guarantee that one of your good friends at some point in your life will feel like this in some major or minor way.

Do them a favor:
Tell them that you’re their friend. Tell them that they can talk to you if they ever need to. Tell them that you can be there for them. Tell them that you appreciate them. Tell them that you enjoy knowing them. When they feel lost, and when they feel like there is nowhere left to go, they may find hope in having someone to turn to, and maybe their life won’t be cut off prematurely by the hopelessness that absorbs some people during depression.
My friend was only nineteen years old when he ended his life. Any victim of suicide at any age has left this world too young, but nineteen is way too young for any circumstance. Please, if you ever should feel alone in this world, turn to someone for help – a friend, a counselor, a family member, or anyone else who you feel close to. Opening yourself up to someone is the first step to escaping the abyss of depression. Somebody out there cares about you. At the very least, if you’re reading this, I would be devastated to receive a notice that you have ended your life prematurely just like I found out how my friend died. Any person that I see in my day leaves an impression on me, and I, along with many other people, I’m sure, would feel yet another tragedy of loss if you were gone.
With my friend’s funeral today, I learned many things and have grown so much as a person, but Lord only knows that I hope to never go through it again with another friend in the ground.
Stay safe.
– Joey Valdez

If you have a friend that you are concerned about, reach out to them.

Don’t be afraid to talk about depression or suicide. Ask them about it. Getting them to open up about their feelings can seriously help.

Listen to them. Hear what they have to say and take it seriously. Don’t judge or act as if what they say is not important.

Encourage them to talk to someone.
If you are in the U.S. they can call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at
1-800-273-TALK (800-273-8255) to reach a trained counselor.

If you are outside the U.S. use this link to find the hotline for your country:
International Hotlines

Don’t be afraid to tell someone on behalf of your friend. Talk to your parents or theirs. Talk to a school counselor. Talk to a coach.
Don’t worry that talking to someone will upset your friend. Their life is more important than hurt feelings.

Being there for a friend can really make a difference. But what you and Joey need to remember is you’re not responsible for preventing someone from taking his or her own life.

You are not alone. There are people who can help.

“Somebody out there cares about you.”

Thank you, Joey.

Hotlines and Resources:

U.S.: 1-800-273-TALK (800-273-8255)

http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/

http://www.thetrevorproject.org/

Outside U.S.
http://www.suicide.org/international-suicide-hotlines.html

Your Powerful Secret

capable

There is something amazing inside of you. Something that allows you to accomplish anything.

It is your powerful secret!

You have the CAPABILITY to choose what your life looks like.

The best part about it: you have the power to make it all happen. YOU can turn your dreams into realities!
I will be honest, there are many circumstances that will definitely get in the way. They will make things difficult, or scary. They may try to discourage you or knock you out, but YOU have the power to overcome them.
Your life is worth it.

There will be people in your life that will try to make you unhappy; be happy anyways. Prove to those people, prove to your circumstances, and prove to yourself that you are unstoppable.
Show those friends that try to tear you down. Show your parents. Show everyone, the amazing, talented, unstoppable person you are. Don’t let that negativity win.
You are the champion in your life.

Remind yourself that you are stronger than the people who try to break you down.

You deserve happiness! You deserve success!
The best part is: you are CAPABLE of those things.

I know it doesn’t always feel that way. I get discouraged all the time. But I have realized that feeling discouraged is only part of the process. It isn’t the destination.

When life starts to feel impossible or discouraging REMEMBER: You DESERVE GREATNESS. You are CAPABLE of GREATNESS

When the negative noise around you is loud, let the voice within you SCREAM out that you are champion of your life. Because you are.
I want to hear you say it! Comment bellow and say “I AM CAPABLE”!

– ttfn G –

See What Happened When Fear Took Over

Fear

Everyone is going to pick a planet and do a report.
“Ooh I will pick Saturn,”
I said as my 7th grade science teacher was laying out the guidelines. I heard him say “report, posters and whatever else you wanted to add”.

I was actually excited and started right away (instead of my typical wait till the last-minute attitude). I went to the library to get the info I would need.

Yes, I actually needed to go to that building with the dusty books where they house ancient encyclopedias.

I was having fun making this project! I made a big model of Saturn with several posters to explain everything.

I was proud of myself for going the extra mile.
I brought my brilliant (yes, it was brilliant) project to school. I was ready for that A! My well-deserved A!

That was until the teacher said we would be presenting in front of the class.
Wait. Hold on, he never said that before. I wasn’t prepared for that.

I am SUPER shy! I felt there was no way I could speak in front of the class. I freaked out!

All I could think about was my fear.

I knew this panic was crazy. I knew it would be over in a few minutes. Somewhere deep down, my inner voice was trying to tell me I could do it, but nope, the fear won.

When the teacher called my name, I said that I didn’t do the project. Just like that I took a zero. I felt so stupid. How could I do all that work and take a zero? But I did.

What happened when fear took over?

I lost my A. I gave it over to fear.

When I think of fear, I always remember that day. I could have gone up and done it. Everyone else did. It was one tiny day in my whole life.
We always think those moments are the worst. We convince ourselves that we can’t get past that fear. Even if I would have gotten up to do my presentation and everyone laughed or I farted or whatever, WHO CARES!!!! That one day, that one minute, does not make who you are.
Why do we expect ourselves to be perfect?
I am still an incredibly shy person, but I am not going to let fear win.

Now when I feel fear creeping up, I turn up my inner voice.

tell myself WHY NOT, I AM CAPABLE , I TOTALLY GOT THIS!

FEAR

Face Everything And Rise

– NBL V –

Are You Normal?

normal

Are you normal?
Can you define normal?
Have you ever tried being normal?
How can you be normal?

If you have ever tried being “normal” or go against what is “normal,” you must have an idea of what you think normal means.

But what if there is no such thing?

What if normal is not what you ever imagined?

What if normal doesn’t exist at all?

Normal is different to everyone. Normal is a perspective. In my opinion, there is no way to truly define it because it can mean so many different things to different people.

What if you let go of the false idea of normal, or not normal, and just be…yourself.

I don’t know if normal exists, but you exist.

Be you.

Do you think normal exists? What do you think being “normal” means?
Comment below!

– ttfn G –

3 Lessons I Learned From Being a #Loser

loser

I am so angry! I am so sad! I feel like a #loser. I am soooo disappointed! Do I just suck? UGH

All of these thoughts rushed through my mind recently. They hit me hard and lived in my brain longer than they should have. They were there for a good reason, or so I thought….

It all started with a writing competition. I love to write, but not just here (although I love this too) but I like creative writing (poetry, short stories). Two years ago I found this writing competition for creative writing and decided to enter. Everything that I entered won! I was beyond excited, crazy person excited. So, I entered again this year.

I wrote a story! I spent a ton of time on it. I worked really hard getting every piece right and I was super excited about the way it turned out! It was my favorite story that I’ve written.

All that work and my favorite story won NOTHING! Nothing? NOTHING!?

I was heartbroken! Beyond disappointed. Remember the beginning of this blog? Well, when I found out I lost; I thought all of those things. Here’s a recap if you forgot: I am such a loser! I suck! UGHH! I literally threw myself a pity party for like a week. I blew up pathetic imaginary balloons and everything. I know, super dramatic, but it’s true.

It hurt me because it changed the way I saw myself.

Before the big loss, I thought I was a pretty good writer, but after… I was convinced that I sucked.

I didn’t want to write any more. But I LOVE to write so of course I missed it. Then I started thinking about a life lesson I had recently learned and I knew I had to decide what I really wanted and make a choice. So, I started writing again. I started facing the fact that things didn’t go the way I wanted and I began to realize that it was okay. It didn’t feel okay at first, but it actually was.
I put way too much importance on a competition. I wanted someone to judge me, but only if I got the answer I wanted.

These are the 3 lessons I learned from being a #Loser:

1. Competition can be fun if it is for the right reasons.

What is the point? It started out as a way to have fun, to get feedback on my writing, and push myself. Win or lose, those reasons shouldn’t change. I actually had a lot of fun and I learned about my writing style.

2. Losing shouldn’t change the fact that you love doing whatever it is you do.

Losing shouldn’t change the fact that I love to write! I let the results of one competition take away the simple fact that writing makes me happy.

3. The most important thing I learned was the outcome doesn’t change ME.

I let the loss seep into my mind and bully me. I let it convince me that I have no talent. But it isn’t the end of the world and it doesn’t mean I have no talent. Maybe I have things to work on, but I am still a writer.

Now that I have had some time to get over myself I can see that you will not always get the results you want, but it doesn’t matter. I put myself out there. I learned something. And I got to do the thing I love: write! Someone’s opinions do not change who I am and they should not change the way I see myself or my talents. They can give me things to work on and think about, but they do not mean I suck and they definitely don’t make me a loser!

I would definitely do it again! I’m not gonna lie, losing is hard….really hard, but it opened my eyes.

I have more confidence in who I am now. I guess I’m not a #Loser after all.

Has anyone out there lost something they put their heart into?
How did you deal with it and what did you learn?

– ttfn G –

Sex, Drugs, and Frozen Pizza

sex and frozen pizza

If you can’t pick a pizza, how will you be able to make decisions about sex?

Kind of a weird question, but my mom is kind of weird. She also makes good points. So, I have to share this nugget with you.

Before I start the story, I have to warn you, my mother LOVES to use random example s to explain life and give advice, and this time is no different. So, here it goes.

One day we were standing in the grocery store and I was in charge of picking out a frozen pizza for an easy dinner. I stood in the pizza isle just staring for way too long because for some ridiculous reason I could not make up my mind.

Finally, my mom walks up to me, stares me down and says “If you can’t pick a pizza, how will you be able to make decisions about sex, drugs, or life for that matter?”

Really? Did she seriously just connect pepperoni and black olives to sex? Yep.

And do I really want to talk about sex in the middle of the frozen isle? Nope.

The connection seems ridiculous but it’s actually a really good point. Stay with me. Trust me, no story is ever quick with my mother.

I suffer from severe indecisiveness. It’s a problem. I would rather let someone else decide things for me, or better yet, just never have to make decisions. But there are some decisions in life that you have to make and they will NOT always be easy.

There are times when you have to be in control and be confident enough to make good choices for yourself even when they are difficult decisions.

Saying yes or no to something like sex is a serious decision. You need to choose what is right for your body, for the person you are with, and most importantly yourself.

Handling peer pressure is a choice. Letting someone else makes decisions about your body, about drugs, about drinking, or anything else is never the right thing to do.

Something like choosing a college is another difficult but important decision. With a ton of possibilities out there, you need to be able to consider options, but ultimately listen to yourself and make a choice.

Picking out a frozen pizza? Not such a serious decision. But if you can’t be confident in the small things like pizza toppings, you will be completely lost when it comes to things that really matter or affect you.

Guess what guys! I picked out a pizza all by myself! Sometimes I amaze myself.

So make those small decisions now!

You will learn to trust your voice and be confident when it comes to decisions that are more important… like sex, drugs, and frozen pizza.

On a side note, she kept singing “Let’s Talk About Sex” the whole time we finished shopping.
Check the song out here: http://youtu.be/ydrtF45-y-g

– ttfn G –

2 Secrets That Give You Power Over Hearing and Saying the Word No

Hearing and Saying the Word No

Do you ever have trouble saying no?
Do you ever have trouble hearing no?

Here are my 2 secrets that give YOU power over hearing and saying the word no.

Hearing the word no:

Will you go out with me? No
Will you go to the dance with me? No
Let’s have sex? No

Hearing the word no can feel like the end of the world.
You might think that if they said NO they must hate you.
You start questioning what you did wrong.
Your life is over!

Little Secret #1: Your life is not over

It doesn’t mean you did anything wrong just because you heard the word no. The person saying no just meant no. They don’t want to do whatever it is you were asking. They have a right to say no and it is perfectly fine. Your life is not ending. You will move on and survive hearing the word no.

Saying the word no:

No, I can’t hang out today.
No, I’m not ready to take it to the next level.
No, I’m not going to the party with you.

Saying the word no can be intimidating.
Maybe they will judge you or not like you.
Maybe you should just say yes.
You’re the bad guy.

Little Secret #2: You are not the bad guy

If you’re busy with other things, it’s ok to say no. If you don’t want to do what someone is asking it’s ok to say no. Saying no does not make you the bad guy. You are not saying you don’t like them. You’re not trying to be mean. No simply means no.

The word no is used to set boundaries because saying yes to everything is impossible.

There is no way you can say yes to everyone and everything. There’s not enough time in a life to do everything other people ask of you. Sometimes you have to say no, unless you want to forget about sleeping for the next 60 years.

Setting limits in relationships, like saying no to drugs and peer pressure. Deciding how far you will go with a boyfriend or girlfriend.

Whether you are hearing or saying, the word no remember the 2 secrets.
1. Your life will not be over when someone says no to you.
2. You can confidently say the word no and not be the bad guy.

– NBL V –

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