Dear Hope: I Need To Go To This Concert

Dear Hope,concert road trip
I need your help convincing my mom to let me go to a concert with my friends. When I asked her if I could go, she initially said yes. But when I told her it was three hours away she freaked out and said no. She feels like it’s not safe for four girls to be driving there alone.

When I talked to my friends, they said their moms said no too, but then one of their moms offered to take us. She said she would drive us there and back and be with us the whole time. We really want to go this concert so we decided we would be ok with her going.

So we all bought tickets. My mom had said yes at first so I figured it would be ok. Her only problem was us being alone. When I tried to tell her, she would not listen to me. She said I already said no and that’s that. She’s still mad because we got into a big argument about it the last time. But what do I do now? I want to go sooooo bad and I’ve already bought the ticket. HELP I need to go to this concert. If I don’t get to go I don’t know what I’ll do. I love them so much.
– UpsetFan

Dear UpsetFan,
I don’t think it’s going to be easy to get your mom to turn her no into a yes. Especially since you bought your ticket without her permission. Prepare yourself for the fact that she might not change her mind.

That said, I have two ideas you can try.

One:
Write her a letter. You’ve tried talking and that’s not working. She is not willing to hear you right now Instead, write out what you want to say. Start with a BIG apology. Apologize for the argument you had. Recognize that you were wrong for buying the ticket without her permission. Then explain the situation and really highlight that an adult will be going with you. Don’t forget to add an I love you and a thank you.

After you have written it, leave it someone you know she will see it. Then wait. Give her a few days to read it. Hopefully she will get back to you soon. Don’t pressure her or bug her about it, just wait it out.

Two:
This is somewhat sneaky, but I think it will work. Ask the mom that has offered to go with you if she would be willing to call your mom. They can talk adult to adult. Your friend’s mom can explain that she was also against it at first, until she decided to chaperone. She can let her know that she will be with you the whole time. Your mom will have a harder time saying no to another parent.

I personally like choice one. I think it’s better if you can work things out with your mom yourself. However, if that’s not working choice two is a winner.

Bonus tip: Write the letter and try working it out AND let her talk to your friend’s mom. She will not only see you are making an effort to do the right thing, but she will also get reassurance from another adult.

Good luck and enjoy the concert.

Just a side note: If you don’t get to go it’s not the end of the world. Don’t stay angry at your mom. It’s not worth it. Be calm and show your maturity so she will be more willing to let you go the next time.

Thank you for being brave and sending in your question.

Dear Hope

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