Dear Hope: Keeping Our Relationship a Secret
I’m dating my best friend and it’s awesome. We have been friends since we were 5. Around the age of 11 people started saying we should start dating and that we would get married someday. We had not even thought of that at all and it felt like pressure. It wasn’t until we were 15 that we started to look at each other in that way. We are now 17 and we just started dating 1 month ago. Except we haven’t told anyone yet. We really want to keep it a secret. We are great friends, but we don’t know how dating will turn out. If we decide we are better as friends than boyfriend and girlfriend then no big deal no one even knew. Our friends pressure us so much that we don’t want them to know yet. I think some of them are starting to suspect something. Especially since I have been acting like I enjoy being single. We are going to tell them eventually just not now. How can we keep it a secret? Also do you think it’s bad for us to keep it secretive?
– Keeping It A Secret
Dear Keeping It A Secret,
How exciting! This is a fun secret, especially since it won’t hurt anyone. It might drive everybody nuts wondering though.
If your relationship is healthy and you’re both comfortable, then it’s fine. There is nothing wrong with keeping it hidden for a little while. You are still feeling out this whole couple thing.
Like you said, you will tell them eventually. Plus, it sounds like your friends will all be very excited and supportive of you both.
Keeping it quiet might be hard if they are already getting suspicious. Act cool. Don’t ignore each other. Don’t act differently towards each other. Everyone already knows you are good friends.
The truth is your friends may figure it out sooner than later. It sounds like they ultimately just want what is best for you both. Remember, your relationship is between YOU and HIM. Don’t let them pressure you both into anything you don’t want or are not ready for.
It sounds like you are both strong people who know what you want. Keep doing what is best for your relationship and have fun!
Thank you for being brave and sending in your question.