Dear Hope: Rockin’ Long Distance
I’m excited to be starting college in the fall. I’m not excited to be 1,000 miles away from my boyfriend. We will be spending the summer together and then doing the long distance thing. We know it won’t be easy, but we love each other so it’s worth it. Do you have any tips to make it easier?
Although it can be difficult for long distance relationships to survive, it’s not impossible. The two main ingredients are effort and trust.
It takes work to keep any relationship together. But, it can take an extra dose of effort for long distance relationships. Not only can time be an issue, you now have miles between you. As with any couple, if the relationship is healthy, the effort is worth it. If the effort starts to become a burden, it might be time to rethink things.
Trusting each other is important. Jealousy is less likely when you have trust. The goal is for you both to have a good college experience while maintaining your relationship. That can be difficult if either of you are worrying about what the other person is doing.
Tip #1 Remember the little things:
The little things you do for each other matter in a big way. Just quick ways to say I care and you’re on my mind.
• Send good morning or goodnight texts.
• Send a quick “You’ve got this!” text, for their next exam.
• Keep each other company during all-night study sessions. (text, Skype, FaceTime)
• Insert your idea here ______________ Be creative! You’ve got this!
You will both feel special when you remember the little things. With busy schedules, sometimes all you have time for are the little things.
Tip #2 To Do List:
Keep a list of the things you would like to do the next time you see each other. Coming up with ideas is a fun thing to do together. It also gives you something to look forward to.
Tip #3 Date Night:
Don’t forget to have dates. Spending quality time with each other is important.
• Talk on the phone while watching the same movie on Netflix.
• Have the same kind of pizza delivered to your rooms.
• Have romantic dinners over Skype.
Get as creative as you want when planning your date night.
Tip #4 Be Realistic:
Life will change. You will both be starting a new adventure. You will be meeting new people and experiencing new things. Your schedules will probably be different. Being realistic means knowing the other person may not be available when you need them. It also means understanding that the other person will be having a life separate from yours. No one should feel guilty for having his or her college experience.
Now that you have read the 4 tips, forget them until school starts.
It’s summer! Go make some great memories. Don’t put all your focus on the fall. Have fun and take tons of pics. Enjoy your time together!
Thank you for being brave and sending in your question.